Everyone has fears. They’re important, and they’ve helped keep us alive throughout our evolution. Think about the fears characters understandably feel at certain points in Game of Thrones, the hugely successful HBO dramatic series which combines elements of medieval times and fantasy.
We’re talking outrageously murderous kings here, plus scheming lords and ladies. Large men with even larger swords. Even fire-breathing dragons.
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In Season One of GOT, a great line illustrates the point about fears perfectly. The speaker is Robb Stark, eldest son of the lord of Winterfell and generally a good guy, who decides to declare war and march south to Kings Landing, the capital of the Seven (usually warring) Kingdoms and home to a lot more of those men with swords.
Theon Greyjoy, the son of another royal house, asks Stark if he’s afraid. And Stark, his hands trembling, replies, “I guess I must be.” To which Greyjoy’s response is perfect: “Good, that means you’re not stupid.”
It certainly was appropriate for the denizens of GOT‘s medieval era to be afraid, but does the same apply to you? For, while fear was an important factor in our hereditary past, in our modern day and age, our fears today are often based more in psychology than actual physical threats.
Drawing on some of the books I’ve enjoyed, I offer six thoughts on why facing your fears will assist you in creating massive success.
1. Fears help you decide what’s real
I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened. – Mark Twain
When you take the time to actually define your fears, you learn to separate fact from fiction. This is an important distinction. Some things you’re afraid of will be valid, but many will be mental worst-case scenarios that have simply spiraled further in your mind than they ever will or would in reality.
2. Fears help you create appropriate responses
What about the fears on your list that you’ve defined that are actually valid, like losing a client or employee, gettng backlash from a layoff or encountering some other tangible fear? Easy. When you face fears that have merit – now that you’ve defined them – you can come up with an action plan of responses to mitigate the damages.
Think of this list as your “fear emergency plan.” You know what you’d do in the case of a fire or earthquake, so why not enact a plan of appropriate responses you could take against some of your more valid business fears?
Bran thought about it. “Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?” “That is the only time a man can be brave,” his father told him.” – George R.R. Martin, series author, A Song of Ice and Fire, on which HBO’s GOT series is based.
Perhaps I’m just missing Game of Thrones in the off-season, but this quote really struck me and is an important facet of facing your fears. You don’t develop bravery and courage in the good times, you develop them when you actually confront fears.
If you were once afraid of starting your own business, but did it anyway, you know the terror, but also the reward, that comes from facing fears head on. Your courage grows with each fear you face.
4. Fears help you develop wisdom
There is wisdom that comes from the experience of working through fears. Some of your fears may have even come true. If you are a business owner and have seen your business falter or fail, perhaps you’ve already lived through adversity.
The silver lining of these experiences is that you learn from them. Wisdom comes from all of life’s experiences, but the fearful or bad ones in particular teach us great lessons. Wisdom is always the by-product of facing your fears, and that’s an important quality to develop.
5. Fears help you develop compassion
Dealing with fears helps your develop compassion. When you yourself have been afraid, you’re more likely to have patience and feel compassion toward others experiencing similar situations.
After all, we all want a good life. When you push hard for what you want, and experience the joys and failures of success, you learn compassion you can use to help others push through their early fears.
We recommend: 10 Fears You Must Overcome When Starting a New Business
You can put yourself in the shoes of someone who is just starting out, and that empathy can help guide that person to have deeper courage.
6. Fears help you develop resilience
“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving; we get stronger and more resilient.” – Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
Resilience comes from facing your fears. You become better than your surroundings and transform yourself above the fear and into bigger and bigger success. Resiliience starts with you, and it begins in your mind. Face your fears and learn to rise to face whatever is in front of you.
This article was originally posted here on Entrepreneur.com.
10 Ways To Develop A Success-Oriented Mindset
Confidence empowered entrepreneurs to take decisive action, and decisive action is what builds confidence.
Take a minute to imagine an entrepreneur you deeply respect. Think of that person at the start of his or her career, working on a product or service that will eventually make it big. Regardless of whom you’ve chosen, chances are the entrepreneur in question had a success-oriented mindset from the outset.
Entrepreneurs who lack confidence or who have a pessimistic mindset will usually fail. It’s hard to motivate people to invest money in a new idea or work for a fledgling company if the entrepreneur behind it lacks confidence. But having a successful mindset isn’t just helpful for those who are launching a new venture. It can also help readers from all walks of life to make smarter decisions that result in better personal or business outcomes.
Here are 10 strategies that can help you develop a winning mindset.
1. Put yourself in challenging new situations
You gain confidence by overcoming challenges, but when you fail to put yourself in challenging new situations because you assume the outcome won’t be positive, you will be unable to grow.
Instead, develop a list of exciting challenges you’re interested in overcoming. They could include exploring a foreign city on your own or enrolling in a challenging business course at your local university. Even volunteering to help with a new project at the office can provide a challenging situation that will foster growth.
Whatever the challenge you select, be sure it is something that interests you; otherwise, it may be difficult to stay focused along the way.
2. Be open to finding a mentor
Mentorship is often discussed with regard to self-improvement and business success. But many professionals assume that finding a mentor is as simple as asking a senior professional for help.
However, as Sheryl Sandberg argues in the Harvard Business Review, finding a mentorship doesn’t work that way. Instead, professionals need to put themselves in situations where they can build real relationships with senior business leaders.
In time, after an existing relationship has formed, it may be appropriate to ask a senior professional for mentorship. That means readers will need to make themselves available to build professional relationships before they can secure a mentor who can help them grow.
3. Think of failure as a learning opportunity
Failure is an outstanding learning opportunity. If you find yourself succeeding frequently, it may be a sign that you aren’t challenging yourself enough.
Develop a mindset that views failure as an experience to learn from. By reframing failure, you’ll find it is easier to take risks. Adopting this mindset will leave you less prone to anxiety, which is key to creating a winning attitude.
4. Keep a folder of your proudest moments
While it’s important to focus on the present and future instead of the past, maintaining a collection of moments you’re proud of can serve as a helpful reminder when you’re feeling down. By periodically reviewing past successes, you may find inspiration for future projects. At the very least, you can use past successes as a way to build long-term confidence.
5. Surround yourself with top talent
Environment plays a significant role in creating our mindsets. After all, we’re social creatures and are influenced by those around us. Surround yourself with talented individuals who can teach you new things and who can encourage you to grow personally and professionally.
If you’re involved in the hiring process at your organisation, look for prospective employees who are better or smarter than you. This will help create an environment that can consistently encourage you to form a successful mindset.
6. Find time to disconnect from stressors
The average American works more hours per week than his or her counterparts in other developed countries. Furthermore, the average number of hours worked has been steadily growing since the 1980s. Unfortunately, work-related stress has been creeping up at the same time.
Readers should find time to disconnect from work-related stress that can make it difficult to adopt a success-oriented mindset. Traveling can be a good way to disconnect, as can adopting a daily meditation practice.
7. Develop a simple morning routine
According to lifestyle gurus like Tim Ferriss, we are shaped by our morning routines. That means it’s important for readers interested in developing a new mindset to develop new habits as well.
Since your morning has the power to make or break your entire day, consider creating a simple morning routine that positions you to have a successful day.
For example, waking up earlier than normal can give you time to focus on yourself in ways that might have otherwise been impossible. With the extra time you can go to the gym or develop a meditation practice to reduce stress, as mentioned above.
8. Set time-bound and achievable personal goals
More than 90 percent of New Year’s resolutions fail. If you’re serious about changing your mindset, you should take a different approach to goal setting. Instead of relying on a New Year’s resolution, create time-bound goals that you know are achievable from the outset. Approaching goal setting from this angle will help to build your confidence, which in turn will reshape your thinking.
9. Listen to your instincts
Part of developing a winning mindset is learning to trust your instincts. According to the Harvard Business Review, we are usually capable of making smart decisions when we rely on our gut instincts.
Confidence in your instincts is a critical component of business success. While it’s usually ideal to rely on research and data to make decisions, there are a variety of scenarios in when empirical evidence is unavailable or inconclusive. In these situations, people with a winning mindset are comfortable making decisions with their gut. This serves them well in the long run.
10. Avoid stagnation
If you feel as though you aren’t learning new things in your personal or professional life, it’s time to change it up. Avoid stagnation in order to continue to grow. This will help you to face new challenges and overcome new obstacles.
Developing a successful mindset can take time. To get started, focus on learning new skills and putting yourself in new situations. By overcoming adversity, you’ll begin to develop faith in yourself.
Establish morning routines and build a network of talented colleagues and mentors in order to avoid stagnation and achieve moments you can be proud of.
This article was originally posted here on Entrepreneur.com.
The Anatomy Of Peak Performance
Besides paying lip service to “positive thinking” what is the reality behind hard work and the remuneration for it?
“The quality of your life is dependent upon the quality of the questions that you ask”
– Tony Robbins
Positive thinking clichés
We all have heard repetitive clichés emanating from the mouths of our parents, teachers, friends and family such as:
- “Just work hard and you shall be rewarded”
- “What you sow you shall reap”
- “Think positively and all will be better”
- “Do not worry tomorrow will be a better day”
Yet most family members and friends will complain that they work hard but that, in their minds, they are overworked and under paid. Besides paying lip service to “positive thinking” what is the reality behind hard work and the remuneration for it?
The purpose of hard work
“Whatsoever your deepest driving desire is, so shall your thoughts be, as your thoughts are, so shall your deeds be, and your deeds shall echo in all eternity” – Upanishads
“As a man thinketh so is he.” – Proverbs
The only real reason for hard work is to build perseverance and “strengthen your spine” because it is very hard to give up on a cause if you have sincerely put in a lot of hard work. However take the time to consider that when you really love what you do and you live your purpose, long hours do not feel so long and hard work can even be energising as opposed to making you tired all the time. When you are driven by purpose and love what you do there is less stress involved within your efforts and better performance will result.
Of the upmost importance is the quality of the work that you put in versus the amount of hours spent doing your work. A razor sharp focus on the activities that serves your business purpose and vision which in turn increases profits is a requirement of smart work.
The Pareto principle applies here:
On average team members spend only 20% of their time on the activities that really serves the business purpose and vision and brings in the desired business results and 80% on activities that does not fully support business results or only to a very small degree. Smart and quality work is therefore ensuring a razor sharp focus and spending 80% of your time on the 20% of the activities that really drives business results.
“The quality of your life is dependant on the quality of the questions that you ask”
– Tony Robbins
How do I identify the twenty percent of the activities that bring in the profits and serves our collective purpose? Now, that is already a better quality question than for example: “Why am I so tired? Why am I so de-motivated? When you ask high quality questions you are already starting to train your brain to come up with better quality answers that will lead up to better quality actions, that is if the reader is brave enough to venture outside of the self-imposed boundaries of his or her own comfort zone.
The following table clearly highlights the difference between high and low quality questions. High quality questions that is answered and acted upon consistently leads to peak performance and lowered stress levels.
Low quality questions often leads to excuses that are void of solution driven thinking and increased stress levels:
|High quality question. (Peak performers should ask)||Low quality question. (That generally leads to poor performance)|
|What creative solutions can we come up with in order to generate more leads from our marketing campaigns?||Why is it so difficult to get leads?|
|Which accurate metric system can we put in place in order to measure all activities that will reveal which ones drive the most profit?||Why am I so overwhelmed by everything that needs to be done?|
|What type of candidate with which type of characteristics do we need to serve our collective purpose?||Why is it so hard to find the right person?|
|How can we align all our processes and systems and remove waste (waste of time and waste of effort) to deliver better results?||I am so tired and demotivated, why is this not working?|
The three pillars of peak performance in business and any area of life
1. A laser focus on Purpose
Being purpose driven and doing what you love is a key factor in producing the desired results and delivering a great performance consistently. Then people start acting out of own accord and no longer have to be asked to do their work.
2. People skills
Sincerely care for people. Study and learn until you know how to speak to different personality types and respect different world views in order to get the best out of each individual. Inspire people to want to do what they sincerely love instead of constantly telling them what to do. Ask high quality questions to your team members to help them to train their brains to come up with high quality answers and solutions. Study human behaviour to understand your clients better and improve upon your people skills in order to enhance your customers’ experience of your product and service.
3. Technical skills
A high level of product knowledge, sales skills, and knowledge of all business processes and systems is of course a requirement of sustainable success. Technical skills only however becomes a potent driver of sought after business results when combined with highly developed people skills.
A peak performance equation
Carefully selecting from the key points of this article the following “peak performance” equation is created:
Being Purpose driven x Asking high quality questions x taking immediate action (no procrastination) x developing to a high level of people skills x developing to a high level of technical skill x Removal of waste (Time wasters and a waste of effort) = Peak performance.
**** Multiplication is used within this equation to portray the fact that all elements within this equation is necessary to create a peak performance environment. Therefore if one element equates to zero the answer is zero, and will not lead to a peak performance environment.
You Need This One Trait To Succeed In Reaching Your Goals
In education, we know how to measure IQ, but what if doing well in school and in life depends on much more than your ability to learn quickly and easily?
When Angela Duckworth started teaching Grade 7 maths, she realised that IQ was not a reliable predictor of who would be her best and worst students. In fact, some of her strongest performers did not have stratospheric IQ scores. Equally, some of her smartest kids weren’t doing so well. Duckworth was convinced that each of her students could learn the material if they worked hard and long enough.
After several years of teaching, she came to the conclusion that a much better understanding of students and learning is required from a motivational and psychological perspective. In education, we know how to measure IQ, but what if doing well in school and in life depends on much more than your ability to learn quickly and easily?
Identifying the success factor
So, Duckworth left the classroom and went to graduate school to become a psychologist. She started studying kids and adults in all kinds of super challenging settings, and in every study her question was, who is successful here and why? Her research team went to West Point Military Academy and tried to predict which cadets would stay in military training and which would drop out. They went to the National Spelling Bee and tried to predict which children would advance furthest in competition.
They studied rookie teachers working in tough neighbourhoods, asking which teachers were still going to be there by the end of the school year, and who would be the most effective at improving their students’ learning outcomes. They partnered with private companies, asking, which of their sales people would keep their jobs? And who would earn the most money?
In all those different contexts, one characteristic emerged as a significant predictor of success, and it wasn’t social intelligence. It wasn’t good looks, physical health, and it wasn’t IQ. It was grit.
What is grit?
Grit is passion and perseverance for very long-term goals. Grit is having stamina. Grit is sticking with your future, day in, day out, not just for the week, not just for the month, but for years, and working hard to make that future a reality. Grit is living life like it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
“To me, the most shocking thing about grit is how little we know, how little science knows, about building it,” says Duckworth. “I do know that talent doesn’t make you gritty. Our data show that many talented individuals do not follow through on their commitments and that grit is usually unrelated or even inversely related to measures of talent.
“So far, the best idea I’ve heard about building grit in kids is something called ‘growth mindset’. This is an idea developed at Stanford University by Carol Dweck, and it is the belief that the ability to learn is not fixed, that it can change with your effort. Dr. Dweck has shown that when kids read and learn about the brain and how it changes and grows in response to challenge, they’re more likely to persevere when they fail, because they don’t believe that failure is permanent.”
Angela Lee Duckworth is based at the University of Pennsylvania, where she studies concepts such as self-control and grit to determine how they might predict academic and professional success.
Learning to Win
“You cannot win the game by simply participating.
You cannot win the game by simply showing up.
You cannot win the game when you are obsessed with what others are doing.
You cannot win the game by simply reading the instructions.
But here’s the thing…
Participating counts. Showing up counts. An awareness of what others are doing counts.
Reading the instructions counts. In isolation our actions mean little. But when you weave them all together, something magical happens. Winners weave.” — Erik Kruger (Personal Development & Leadership Coach and Speaker)
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